Don't focus on what you don't want

I find myself as searching for a new job thinking about only what I don't want. I don't want to work for another software company, do I? I don't want to work in manufacturing again, do I? I don't want to work with external customers anymore, do I? I don't want to work on the Eastside, do I? I don't want to work for a small company, do I? I don't I don't I don't.

So what is it that I do want? Why am I being so negative about this whole thing? Why can't I focus on what it is I do want instead? Really what is it? Gah!!

Positively shocking that I'm so negative. This job has got me feeling completely useless and luckless. I've lost sight of what I can offer and what I'm good for. What could I offer a company? What kind of company would want me?

But really it's not only about what they want, it's about me too. I get to make this decision as well, right? We get to decide if we like each other. I am a part of that equation. I get to choose where I send my resume and where I want to begin this whole thing. But that's the problem, where do I want to start?