Friday, July 23, 2010

Enough with the tears already

I have been an emotional nut job lately. To the ten thousandth degree this is actually an understatement. I weep at TV shows. But have you seen "Th Choir" on BBC America? Tear fest! Or the slot car episode of "James May's Toy Stories" also on BBC America? Weep weep weep. Then there's Tally needing my nearly constant attention causing me to sob as well.

It doesn't help that I'm stuck in the house most all of the time. See when you go out places you spend money and when there is no money coming in that is a bad bad thing. So at home I stay with an adorable, yet ultra needy dog, at my side. With the computer in front of me or a text book on my lap or napping on the couch or watching TV and weeping.

It's nice to have been depressed and come through on the other side if only now it means that you can see these times for what they are, set backs that you can get through. I know that I won't always feel this way but damn does it make it hard to want to keep on going some days.

I've made good head way in the real estate classes but there is definitely a lot more to do. I won't be done by the end of the month and a lot of that is because my mood has gotten in my way. It's kept me away from the online class or the text book when I really should have been there. It's frustrating and the voice in my head that is telling me I'm doing the wrong thing and that I will most certainly fail is sometimes very difficult to shut up.

It also hasn't helped that my dad has had a big professional set back this month and my empathy level is at a peak where he is concerned. Talking to him the other day made my sad state even lower which is never good. Thankfully Molly came over to borrow something and I got to spill my tears all over the place with another human being rather than on my couch alone with Tally and BBC America.

So today is better, must be or I wouldn't be here writing about it. Took Tally on a long walk this morning and then took myself for a roller blade around Green Lake. Let me tell you that made it abundantly clear to me that I am out of shape in a big way. I could only go around once and it was hardly 3 miles! Oh well I've only been one other time so far this summer so I shall give myself a pass on that. At least I went. I was out there. Big yahoo for that.

So right now I have a dog giving me her sad little eyes wanting to go for our evening walk. I even had to feed her dinner early in order to distract her so that I could sit here and write this entry. This won't always be my reality. I will finish my real estate course and I will pass the exam and I will find a job. It's what I want so that's what will happen. Power of positive thinking hard at work here and I'm working at believing it. And enough with the tears already!

Book 19 of 2010

Finished another book two nights ago, "Emotionally weird" by Kate Atkinson. I'd read her other book and thought it was OK. This one was OK too. No reason to recommend it but not horrible. High praise, huh? It was only $1 in the clearance area at Half Price Books so that makes it worth it.

Started reading book 20 last night, borrowed from Molly. It will be a quick read. Super large font and the narrator is a dog.

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Delay in programming; 18 books and counting

Sorry for the lack of posting. I've been here. Reading the writing of the other blogs I love. I've been writing posts in my head even but never putting them to "paper". And since right now I should be studying I think I'll get you up to speed instead.

First of all I've definitely been reading. There was "Size 14 isn't fat either" by Meg Cabot which is #2 of 3 in the Heather Wells series. I'd already read #3 previously not realizing I was doing it out of order, YIKES! Hate that. So after reading this one I read the third again, "Big Boned". They are all good easy reads. I hadn't realized until picking up this book how prolific Meg Cabot is. Have I been under a rock? And then there was "Grave Goods" by Ariana Franklin. I really love her style. I pay full price for her books when ever I find them and I'm not generally a fan of historical fiction. Then there was "Sammy's House" by Kristin Gore. I'd read "Sammy's Hill" a while back and when I saw this one I had to have it. Again Sammy was a wonderfully flawed character that I kept rooting for. And only in reading this book did I realize that Kristin is Al & Tipper's daughter.

After that I had run out of book so I started a re-read of "Pride and Prejudice". I don't even know at this point how many times I've read it. Then on my birthday (Sunday 27th I turned 36!!) I realized I had a bag of books that needed to go back to Half Price Books for reselling. So as a present to myself I took them in and walked away with $6.50 for the bag and used it to buy two more books for only $3.00! Love it when my wallet comes out ahead and so does my nightstand.

So does all of that reading count as 4 more books for the year even though one was a re-read? I think so. And since I'm the one doing the counting who's going to argue? I think that brings me to a total of 18 so far for the year.

And in other news I've decided to take the classes for becoming a real estate agent. So far I've only made it through the first four chapters and I'm not making any head way while typing here but oh well. I'll get it done. I promise. My goal is to have the course(s) and the state exam done by the end of July. Hope that's not too lofty a goal since it's 90 credit hours of studying to do. I'm just not back into the study groove yet. I'm out of practice. Yeah, that's it. I'm not a procrastinator I'm just out of practice. HA!

There are other things occurring but I'm not sure if I'm ready to write about them here yet. So I shall let them be written in my head for a bit longer. Posting more than once a month seems like a good idea so I'll see if I can get back into practice doing this too. Hasta luego.