Thursday, September 2, 2010

Lacking

Today I feel as though I am lacking in so many ways. Perhaps it's all hormonal but it is debilitating.

While searching Monster today I saw a listing for "the" real estate company that I would like to work for. It was a link to a test to take that would tell you if you match the "4 Core Capacities" of their top performing agents. Guess who doesn't match, me that's who.

As I read through my results I thought "that's right" and "yeah that's me" to these types of statements:

  • Understanding and compassion are central to your life strategy.
  • You strive to cause people and things to function well together.
  • Seeing potential and opportunity is a primary talent.
  • Strategic thinking is your forte.
  • You can always see another way to put things together.
  • You have wit and creativity in your thinking.
  • Understanding others and working with them is a key asset of yours.
You always want the results of these tests to feel accurate. You'd rather it ring true with you than to feel a complete mismatch. Then I got to the section where they described the results for their top agents. It's just not me. Their number 1 is my number 3. Their 4th category is my 2nd.


Even before I found this test today I was feeling out of sorts, and yes hormonal, but overall unsettled. What if this is the wrong path? What should I be doing? What do I really want to do? I'm really feeling so lost right now. So unguided and directionless.


When I got back home from my trip to MN and TX I was feeling fantastic but now the high has faded. I'm feeling scared and confused. I can't keep being unemployed, financially, or realistically. I want to be around people again. I want to be productive again. I want to...something again but what?

1 comment:

Pickles and Dimes said...

Oh man, I'm sorry about that test. Do you know anyone who works for that company that you can talk to and find out about the real company culture?

Whenever I feel in a rut job-wise, I like to make a list of things I like to do and things I'm good at doing (not always the same thing) and try to figure out where I can work that allows me to do those things I'm good at AND like to do.

[hugs]