Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Can you hear my intestines from where you're sitting?

If you do not want to read about my intestines then I suggest you go away now. You have been warned.

The amount of noise emanating from my intestinal track today is downright embarrassing. Things are boiling, roiling and otherwise cavorting down there something fierce. While I'm not entirely sure of the cause I am leaning toward placing the blame on the licorice gorging of yesterday. That certainly isn't going to stop me from reaching in the drawer where they are hiding in plain sight and having more as soon as I finish eating lunch.

My intestinal functions and I have been trying to work out some sort of working arrangement over the past few months. I try to hold up my end of the deal by shoving fiber loaded food into my eating hole at every possible moment. The intestines still don't seem to be happy about it.

Like today they are squealing like a little baby pig. It's really not cool. My only saving grace is that the one person who might be able to hear it has had his head phones on listening to very loud music so far today.

I know I'm making light of it but it is quite a nuisance. It's not very much fun to be overrun by gas and its tumblings and rumblings. I suppose I'll just have to learn to live with it or perhaps by stock in Beano.

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